Is Pleasing Others Your Aim?
 
C K Joseph
Divine Retreat Centre, Muringoor
Through these words St Paul is touching the spot where grows a cancer in our spiritual life. As our hearts are soiled by sin, our effort is to gain the favour of man rather than of God. That is why we suffer badly when we lose recognition, love and favour from human beings. We consider their goodwill as very important. If we lose it we suffer much. We, therefore, try our best to please them. But we lose sight of the fact that we may, by those means, lose the favour of God.

It is very easy to slip into the company of those who deny Jesus when we try to please men. When he condemned Jesus to death, this is exactly what Pilate did. " Pilate, wishing to satisfy the crowd, released Barabbas for them; and after flogging Jesus, he handed him over to be crucified" (Mk 15:15).

Today, in several Christian homes, serving drinks and getting drunk have become a fashion on occasions like weddings, engagements, baptisms and birthdays.Though we know that this is an evil, we do it in order to please relatives and friends.

In the light of all this, Jesus asks us, "What is the purpose behind your manner of speaking and acting?" We deal with those outside the family in a friendly manner. At the same time in our own homes we are intolerant and brusque. Though we are very much aware of this fact, there is a hidden purpose in our behaviour. We need the good opinion, respect, love and recognition of others. We take it for granted that these are readily available in our homes. But if our aim is to gain God's favour, we shall behave lovingly inside our homes also. Another danger is the mentality to be like a Roman when in Rome. We modify our behaviour according to that of our colleagues and those around us. We are ready to do whatever they do. We join them even if it is to gossip or crack indecent jokes. We adopt their opinions and way of dressing. It is because we are reluctant to behave differently in the company of others that we are compelled to act in this manner.

We may put on still other acts. We may say that we do not want to give displeasure to others. If that is the case we may not be able to say anything about our faith to others. How then can we become witnesses to Jesus? The truth is not this. We do not wish to lose any body's favour. At any cost we should not have any antagonists. Therefore, we are forced to curry favour with others and behave in an unjustifiable manner. In such a situation even if we wish to bear witness to Christ, there will not be anyone to believe us. We are constantly afraid of what others might be thinking about us. Instead of fearing God, we fear human beings. "Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell"(Mt 10:28). Yes, we should be afraid of losing God's favour while we try to gain human favour. If God is not on our side, if he does not fight for us, we are lost. That is certain. If we constantly seek others' favour, we will not be worthy of being called God's servants in this world as well as in the next. God has the power to cast us into the kingdom of Satan. If we are separated from the source of life, we might hear one day the terrible voice of God, "You are not for me". What will man's favour avail us then?

We should aim to be always on the side of God and gain his favour at any cost. So we should come to a firm decision. We should give up the attempt to please men. We should try to gain God's favour. Our happiness in eternity will depend on this. Let us listen to God's word of recognition: "And a voice from heaven said, 'This is my son, the Beloved, with whom I am well pleased'" (Mt 3:17; 17:5) We shall realise that there is nothing more precious than receiving God's favour and all our efforts will be geared towards attaining this end. We shall then enjoy God's love to the full. That is the deepest longing in our consciousness. No one can give us so great a love. We cannot, therefore, be satisfied with human love.

We cannot be absolutely certain that the love of others will be there if we please them. Human love is like the mist that we see for a moment and then disappears. Tomorrow the circumstances may change. The love and constancy offered today may not be forthcoming tomorrow. There is only one person for us to depend on. We can be certain that we shall obtain his love and all the gifts he has.That is the nature of the one who is our God and Redeemer. If God does not count us among his servants, if he is not with us, what can we do?

Jesus advises us: "Choose me; choose my path". Let us surrender ourselves in order to please God in our words and works. This is to surrender ourselves to the cross, because people will then withdraw their favour from us. It is a terrible situation when they do not love or respect us. They will reject us and show enmity. But we shall enjoy God's love. Those who are with God will also love us. It is always thus. In the proportion in which we love God and try to please him, we shall be united in love with those we live with. In order to obtain this priceless experience, it is worth going through a little suffering.