I was visiting the sick in a hospital one evening. There was a 70-year-old mother with whom I struck up a conversation. She was not totally bed-ridden but could not fully help herself. But there was no family member to attend on her. While talking to her I asked, "Aren’t your children with you?" The usual reply came, "Children, grandchildren and little children are all there-but they are all busy with their work. Besides, I am not so badly off. In cases of necessity other patients and their attendants are here."

I prayed for her for a while and then turned to move on to another patient. The old mother then asked me a thought- provoking question: "In which direction does water flow?" As I was weighing the implication of the question and the possible response it evoked, she herself provided the answer: "Is it not downwards?" Yes, it is ! I nodded in assent. The old mother added a comment: "So too does love".
 
 

"Love flows downwards". Through this short statement, this mother was sharing a great vision of hers. It was not a knowledge that she gained from books. Rather, it was the quintessence of the self-awareness that had been built up while passing through the cross-currents of life. In other words, it was an insight that God had given to her in her inmost consciousness.

Love flows downwards. Parents love their children as their all in all. They live for them, sacrifice themselves to the utmost for their sake. They set aside their own interests and conveniences and labour hard to bring them up. Children receive so much love and life from their parents. When they grow up, in which direction does their love flow? Towards their children! Not to the parents who loved them above their own selves. This is the law of nature and God’s plan. The anxiety over the illness of one’s children is a hundred times more than the anxiety over the illness of one’s parents . The eagerness to satisfy the needs of one’s parents is only a fraction of the intense desire to fulfil the wishes of one’s children. When we realise and accept this truth, we become aware that love flows downwards. The mind does not then rebel or complain, "Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant" (1 Cor 13:4).

When so much love has been bestowed on the children, is it not ingratitude not to love the parents correspondingly in return? If it is so, what is the use of bringing up children? Such thoughts of loss and gain may arise in our minds at times. It is here that spiritual light must guide man aright . The chief purpose of bringing up children is not to procure that same love in the same measure in return. Parents rear children in order to fulfil the will of God. If there is any reward for it, it is to be had from the hands of God. "The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup" (Ps 16:5).

Any service rendered to another is God’s will—be it parents bringing up children; teachers sharing their knowledge with their students; doctors and nurses tending the sick; or social workers assisting the destitute. The reward for it is not to be expected from the recipient of the service done. On the other hand, be consoled that what is received freely is to be given freely. We will not then be tempted to label and condemn those on whom we lavish our love as "the ungrateful ones". Neither will the sourness and bitterness of complaining fill the mind.
 
 

Life and health are God’s free gifts. This awareness of God’s gratuitousness is the basis of a generous mind. His will is that we give freely. It is not proper that we keep an account of what we give and wait to be rewarded for it, " You received without payment; give without payment"(Mt 10:8).

This does not mean that those who are served need not express their gratitude. It only means that the chief aim of those who serve must not be a return of love and gratefulness. The great reward for service is the simple satisfaction of having fulfilled one’s duty. Those who accomplish their duty should not expect any gratitude. "So you also, when you have done all that you were ordered to do, say, ‘We are worthless slaves; we have done only what we ought to have done!’ "(Lk 17:10),

"Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love" (1 Jn 4:7-8).